Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Ponderous Questions #2: Don't mothers deserve the mystical grace of bilocation most?

Retrieved from the circular files of the Vatican. This series started here.

To Whom It May Concern
St. Peter's Basilica
Vatican City

(Jelly stain here)

I have been reading about saints receiving the grace of bilocation: such as St. Anthony of Padua, Padre Pio, and more. While I have been inspired and impressed by such miracles, I would like the Church to explore why this grace hasn't been given more often to those who really need it: mothers. That's right, I know that the celibate life is a sacrifice and a grace, but it seems to me that this gift is kind of wasted on them. Now, I have five kids. In any given moment, I need to attend them all to make sure #1 isn't smearing fingerpaint into the carpet, #2 isn't trying to hardboil an egg in the microwave, #3 isn't arm-wrestling the cat again, #4 isn't rummaging the garbage for his latest snack, and #5 hasn't pulled off her diaper in an effort to "help go potty". If the Church could please advise how to pray for the grace of bilocation--or trilocation? quadlocation? quintlocation?--for discipline purposes, I would be eternally grateful.

I also think you would be creating a real niche in the parenting self-help book market: a title like Parent Like A Saint: Bilocate your way to well-behaved kids would sell like hotcakes in my parish.

Thanks for your consideration,
Harried Mom


Literacy-chic said...

Hmmm... For better or worse, that would solve the issue of stay-at-home vs. working moms pretty much permanently! ;)

The Ironic Catholic said...

Of course, another way to handle this would be for the Church to name the "eyes in the back of the head" phenomenon as a mystical grace long ignored.

Mac McLernon said...

IC, teachers have that one too