Monday, August 20, 2007

Truth Is Stranger #54: Golgotha Fun Park


Friends, I have returned from Honky Tonk Tennessee. Garth has not responded to my offer for theologically correct country songs...yet. But on the up side, I know why I started this blog now: because I grew up Catholic in the South. The South just seems to breed ironic insight, especially when paired with religion. I'm sure there is a dissertation in that somewhere, but let this gem I sighted (and nearly swerved off the road guffawing) while driving through the lovely state of Kentucky suffice:

Golgotha Fun Park (as reviewed by Roadside America)
Three white crosses loom near the parking lot and mark the final hole; to get there, determined players putt their way through the hazards and miracles of the Good Book. After renting a club and ball in the gift shop, eager Golgotha fans line up at hole #1, The Book of Genesis. The first nine holes are inspired by the Old Testament: Adam and Eve's expulsion from the Garden of Eden, Moses parting the Red Sea, Daniel and the Lion. A sign at each hole helpfully spells out the relevant Biblical passage. Obstacles are standard mini-golf course tunnels, twists, and chutes. We're amused that the scenes are comprised of repurposed lawn ornaments and cement statuettes -- no priest-folk artist spent his life carving here. Jonah sits in the Whale's mouth, comfortable in shorts; a statue of St. Francis monitors porcelain animal pairs boarding the Ark. Old Testament stories make for better hazards, so the first nine holes are easy to identify without reading the signs....

As another blogger mentions, why not just name the place "Place of the Skull Family Playground"?

As well, apparently the place is barely open (it defines "mom and pop enterprise"). But the sign lives on forever. And it is for sale....
I.C.

3 comments:

Jenny from Chicago said...

LOL, I'm just glad your back. Thanks for the IC fix.

Joyful Catholics said...

That puts a real twist on the "FORE!" Gospels.

John said...

Hey, you can't spell 'fun' without 'crucifiction'.