Saturday, January 12, 2008

Variations on the Mark of the Beast

Hat tip to Alive and Young for pointing all to this very funny takeoff on The Book of Revelation's "666" as the Mark of the Beast:

660 Approximate Number of the Beast
DCLXVI Roman Numeral of the Beast
665 Number of the Beast's Older Brother
667 Number of the Beast's Younger Sister
664 or 668 Number of the Beast's Next-Door Neighbors
999 Number of the Australian Beast
333 Number of the Semi-Beast (also "Halfway to Hell")
66 Number of the Downsized Beast E-mail Address of the Beast
1-666-666-6666 Phone & FAX Number of the Beast
1-866-666-6666 Toll Free Number of the Beast
(which could also be written 18-666-666-666!)
1-900-666-6666 Live Beasts, available now! One-on-one pacts!
Only $6.66 per minute!
(Must be over 6+6+6 years old!)
$665.95 Retail Price of the Beast
$710.36 Price of the Beast plus 6.66% Sales Tax
$769.95 Price of the Beast with accessories and replacement soul
$656.66 Wal-Mart Price of the Beast (next week $646.66!)

Oh wait, there's more...see the whole list at


LutheranStudent said...

Hi. I've been a long-time admirer of your blog. As a matter of fact, you inspired me to start my own. Frankly, I think mine is way too serious and boring. But here's something I think you can work with:

Maddy said...

Reminds me to replace the batteries in the calculator!

Allen said...

I'd call the "halfway to hell beast" the mid-evil beast.

SherryTex said...

99.95 for the Do it Yourself, Beast in a Box!*

You could pay more but why?

Yes, for only a fraction of your soul plus carrying charges, we'll send you Beast in a Box!* Guaranteed to cause chaos, pain, and what will seem like an utterly dire end of the world type senario using just the venals you have lying around the house!

For an additonal $35.99, you can also upgrade to ensure your Beast in a Box! is customized to meet all your apocalyptic needs.

*Beast in a Box! is not sold in stores and is only available via this toll free number. Supplies are limited, restrictions may apply so order today!

Rufus McCain said...

700 = number of the beast rounded up to the nearest hundred.

The Ironic Catholic said...

Rufus--ergo, The 700 Club. ;)

The Ironic Catholic said...

Lutheran Student--interesting coffins. Verrrry interesting....