Augustine: Late have I crossed the road, so ancient and so new. Late have I crossed you.
Francis of Assisi: It is no use walking anywhere to preach unless our walking is our preaching. Therefore, I crossed the road.
Thomas Aquinas: All I have written seems to me like so much straw after what I experienced crossing the road.
Dorothy Day: As Dostoevsky said, "To cross the road in reality is a terrible and harsh thing compared to crossing the road in dreams."
Mother Teresa: We are not called to be successful in crossing the road, but faithful.
Therese de Lisieux: I know! MY VOCATION IS CROSSING THE ROAD!
Martin Luther: Here I stand, I cannot cross the road, so help me God.
John Wesley: My heart was strangely warmed, and thus I crossed the road.
Ulrich Zwingli: I crossed the road to destroy this image, an obvious font of idol-worship....
Pope John Paul II: We stand on the threshold of hope, ready to cross the road.
Pope Paul VI: If you want peace, work at crossing the road.
Teresa of Avila: After tripping and landing in a puddle in the middle of the crosswalk, she sensed God saying to her, "This is how I treat my friends." Teresa answered, "Lord, no wonder you have so few!"
Humor-Blogs.com has a few funnier jokes than these. Not holier, though.