So I offer my friend Allen's Brain--who has done a marvelous satire piece on a new phenomenon, "Virtue Vineyards":
We have Scripture printed on t-shirts, bumper stickers, neckties, toys, and even candy wrappers (like the Testa-mints) but haven't you ever wished that it would go where it was REALLY needed?There's more here. Thanks, Allen!
We at Virtue Vineyards--the very first Christian Witness Winemakers--have heard your cry! We produce wines and spirits inspired by the Bible, with the sacred text printed right on the label!
Here are just a few of what Virtue Vineyards has to offer:
Sunday Go-To-Meetin' Cabernet - Incur the Lord's wrath with this fine vintage, inspired by Leviticus 10:9
Viper's Sting - Renowned for its lovely red color, this sparkling wine goes down smooth, but watch out for those hangovers! With its low price and the warning of Prov 20:1 & Prov 23:29-35 on the label, it may be just the thing for the burgeoning alcoholic in your life!
Cana Wedding Wine - You'll never run out of this celebratory wine, packaged in generously-portioned 20 gallon stone jars! And the price is nothing short of miraculous! Messiah-approved! (Jn 2:6-10)
Timothy's Olde Fashioned Medicinal Tonic - A little wine for your stomach. (1 Tim 5:23)
Naked Noah - It's almost shameful how good this wine is! Goes great with Ham! (Gen 9:20-24)