Update! We have winners (and great entries!):
Paul Cat: On his second coming Jesus opted for window washing instead of carpentry.Allen: Hey! [tap-tap-tap!] Stop looking at that porn site!
Hey! [tap-tap-tap!] Can you scoot to the left a little? I wanna read today's "Ironic Catholic" post! Wha? Oh, never mind. That's just "It Came From Allen's Brain!"
Rita: Lord, help my UN belief.