Monday, October 31, 2011

The One, The Only Ironic Catholic Interview with Rob Kroese, author of Mercury Rises

Everyone, it was my great pleasure to pose some questions to Rob Kroese, aka Diesel from the mostly defunct humor blog Mattress Police, turned humor writer of "may become a cult classic" Mercury Falls and the newly released Mercury Rises. If you've read the books, you know that they are absolutely not theological texts but that Rob knows some theology and likes to play around with it. He is Christian Reformed, a deacon in his church community, and agreed to "talk" a bit about Christianity, writing, humor, and underground mammals. Without further adieu -- welcome to the Ironic Catholic, Rob Kroese. Virtual Holy Water to your right. Let's go.

IC: So, besides writing Mercury Falls and Mercury Rises, what do you do in real life?

RK: I'm an extremely boring software developer. I mean, I write extremely boring software. Also, I am extremely boring.

IC: You’ve got to know the adage, “write what you know.” You’ve now written two books on mostly invisible spirits, the Apocalypse, and Armageddon. What are you implying here?

RK: I start out writing what I know and then get distracted by angels and demons and explosions. What I know is boring. The stuff that goes on in my imagination is pretty wild though.

IC:. Christians and humor, humor and Christians: Go.

RK: I have a theory that Christianity is itself a joke. Think about it: humor is all about meeting the reader's expectations in an unexpected way. It's a way of resolving tension by answering a question with an answer that is both completely wrong and perfectly right. That's what Christianity is. The Hebrews wanted a King and a Deliverer. Well, they got Him. Just not the way they expected.

IC:
Who’s the most humorous character in Scripture and why?

RK: I think Jonah is pretty great. This is a guy who did not mess around. God told him to go to Nineveh and preach and he said, you know what? I think I'm going to RUN AWAY TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD. The story is Job is pretty funny in a way, too. This guy has everything and then one day his servants show up and tell him, one after another, that whoops! all your stuff is gone. All in one day he gets hit by the Chaldeans, the Sabeans, fire from the heavens, and a windstorm. That was a very bad day. Job is actually a rather important character in Mercury Rests, the third (and final) Mercury book. He is an irrepressible optimist and a foil to the more pessimistic Cain.

IC: One of the things I like about your writing is that while Mercury 1 and 2 are absolutely not theology textbooks, you clearly know more about theology than the average Joe, and it shows. How’d you get to be so smart?

RK: 15 years in Christian schools, particularly the four years that I spent half-paying attention to my philosophy classes at Calvin College. I've always loved playing around with abstract philosophical and theological concepts. It's entertainment for me.

IC: Your writing gets compared a lot to Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams. Are you honored, offended, or nonplussed by that comparison? Are there any other writers you’d say are an influence?

RK: I love Douglas Adams. Tried to read one of Pratchett's Discworld books and couldn't get into it. The only other Pratchett I've read is the first quarter of Good Omens, which I read while I was working on Mercury Falls, just to make sure I wasn't accidentally ripping them off. I consider it a huge compliment to be compared to either Adams or Pratchett, though. They both have a fanatical following. Vonnegut is another favorite of mine. I love the way he can cut through a mountain of bullsh*t with one terse sentence.

IC: Is it a requirement to live in California to skewer the Apocalypse fakers? Or amazingly convenient?

RK: You know, Harold Camping not only lives less than 2 hours from me; we are from the same religious tradition originally (Christian Reformed). You'd think I could get him to return my phone calls. I really need a quote for book #3.

IC: Speaking of everlasting battles against evil, how are those moles in your yard?

RK: Not moles. Gophers. The battle rages on, until I breathe my last breath.

IC:
Since a lot of IC readers are bloggers, I have to ask: do you miss blogging? Or has Twitter filled that part of your soul?

RK: Not really. Blogging was hard work. It definitely prepared me well for writing a novel, though. I learned how to write short, punchy chapters that kept the reader's interest. The novels take all my writing energy these days.

IC: Last but not least: Is Mercury Catholic or Reformed?

RK: A lot of people have compared Mercury Falls to Kevin Smith's Dogma and I think it's an apt comparison, except that Mercury Falls is the Reformed version of the story. It deals less with the trappings of Catholicism than with the obsessions of the Reformed theologians, like free will and determinism.

I think Mercury is sort of a hopeful agnostic. He wants to believe in something bigger than himself, but unfortunately the people he works for are idiots, so sometimes it's hard to maintain the faith. If I recall correctly, one of your criticisms of Mercury Falls was basically that God never shows up. And while I sympathize with that criticism, I deliberately did not make God a character in the story, because it felt like cheating. I wanted the angels to be just in the dark about God's existence and nature as human beings are. Which doesn't mean that they are *completely* in the dark, of course. You see some characters who really are God-like in the best sense, such as the archangel Michelle. Michelle obviously believes in *something*, even it if isn't spelled out in the book what it is. You'll see more of that with Job in Mercury Rests.

***

I want to thank Rob for his graciousness and his support of all humorous writing in bloggerdom. He's done a lot to encourage it in others, and writes hysterical stuff himself. Best wishes to him and I encourage you to read Mercury Falls and Mercury Rises.


Friday, October 28, 2011

Friday's QOTD

The man who lives in contact with what he believes to be a living Church is a man always expecting to meet Plato and Shakespeare tomorrow at breakfast. He is always expecting to see some truth that he has never seen before.

-- GK Chesterton,
Orthodoxy,
Ch. 9

Thursday, October 27, 2011

We all need a break today....



(Get it?)

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Calgon, Take Me Away! If Calgon Commercialized Psalm 63


Such a missed opportunity. Especially for harried parents. And church workers.

1 You, God, are my God,
earnestly I seek you;
I thirst for you,
all my skin longs for you,
in a dry and parched life
where there is no bathwater.

2 I have hoped for you in the bathroom
and beheld your promise of quiet and cleanliness.
3 Because your soap is better than life,
my lips will glorify you.
4 I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lather my hands.
5 I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of bath salts;
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

6 In my bathtub I remember you;
I think of you through the watches of the night.
7 Because you are my help,
I sing in the shower of your wings.
8 I cling to the guardrail;
your bathmat anchors me.

9 Those who want to interrupt me will be destroyed;
they will go down to the depths of the earth.
10 They will be given over to the lye soap
and become dry like dermal sandpaper.

11 But my skin will rejoice in God;
all who swear by God will glory in bubbles,
while the mouths of lye-ers will be silenced.


(Sorry in advance.)

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Caption Contest #104

...or else


We have a winner!
Allen's Brain: For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and we really need to manage the traffic!

Sunday, October 23, 2011

The winner of the adopting Alex giveaway...

...announced!

If you didn't win, you should just go buy one of my sister-in-law's rosaries at her online shop. So pretty. And she's 6 months pregnant...she could use the money for her own impending hospital expenses!

Thank you, everyone, for the words of support and prayers. Alex needs them. You can follow the adoption journey here.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Friday's QOTD

"I can't. God can. I'll let Him."

--from a student paper

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Last Day of Alex's Big Bleg (and you may win a lovely rosary)!

(Alex at three!)

People have been so generous to us and (much more importantly) to Alex. If you haven't looked at this blog in a week, we're in the midst of our big bleg drive for pre-travel funds to help us in our adoption of 5 yr old Alex, who has cerebral palsy and is living in an institution in Eastern Europe. There is one more day to participate in this drive by contributing at this chip in widget (which goes to our PayPal account):




And someone on Saturday will win a $30 credit at my sister-in-law Becky's Etsy shop, Roses for Mary. One of her many lovely rosaries is seen at right. It's a Respect Life rosary (October is Respect Life month, you know!).... And if you're not a rosary person and you win, we'd be happy to give you a $30 Amazon Giftcard instead.

Thank you, thank you, thank you everyone!

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Want a funny book? Mercury Rises Released and (Sort of) Reviewed!

I know, I know, hard to believe I'm not hawking my own!

Friend o' the blog, Rob Kroese, publishes today his sequel to Mercury Falls, named...Mercury Rises. (On the cover: "The most highly anticipated sequel to Mercury Falls ever written!" Hee.) So glad Mercury has an angelic bungee cord... this was too much fun to leave be with only one story.

I received a proof copy a few weeks ago and my husband--yes, my professional writer husband--picked it up and has not let me look at it. He has declared it "better than the first." Now I really liked the first, so I await time to read it with bated breath. (See, I'm under a serious deadline to finish writing MY book--not funny, it's an academic tome--and a serious deadline in my heart to get Alex out of his institution and into our home as our son. AKA I'm swamped.) Rob is a talented guy and this is worth your $2.99 on Kindle, I'm sure. There's a paper version too.

So go forth and read!

I hear Fr. Jim Martin has a humor book just released too. I haven't read it (hey! see my life, above), but although I'm sure it is enjoyable, thoughtful, and a great read, I'll place my bets that Mercury Rises is a bit edgier. And that the two authors may enjoy each other's company for lunch. (And I wanna be there, you two.)

***

The Big Whopping Bleg for Alex (plus cool giveaway) continues, until Friday. Thanks for your prayers and support.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Friday, October 14, 2011

Friday's QOTD

“Gratitude is one of the least articulate of the emotions, especially when it is deep.”


***

Along that line, we thank you all in hearts and prayers and the emails are coming....The Big Bleg for Adopting Alex and cool giveaway continues through Oct 21.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

A Spiritual Direction Session In A Rockin' Nutshell



Ashley Cleveland's Don't Let Me Fall. Think of a overtly Christian Janis Joplin, and listen.

***

p.s. The Big Bleg for Adopting Alex continues. More here.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Want to help change a life? Win a beautiful rosary too? UPDATED

Friends, you know from a previous post that we are thick in the middle of living out a call to adopt Alex, a beautiful 5 yr old child of God who lives in Eastern Europe and is stuck in a (VERY) basic care institution simply because he has CP. Some people have asked what they can do to help change Alex's life. And the first thing we always say is pray for Alex's protection. Children with special needs are in pretty dire straits if they are orphaned in this country: no school ever, primitive care, limited treatment for their diseases or disabilities. While we have recent information that he is doing OK, considering, we'd very much like it to stay that way and pray for his protection every morning and evening.

But the second reality is that international adoption is not cheap at all. No one I know has $25,000 cash lying around. While we are in a better situation than we could have expected financially, we could really use help with the pre-travel expenses associated with this adoption. For example, sic needs to renew his passport ($110). We need to pay for all these documents to get apostilled ($3-10 a document, and there are what, 20 documents?). Paying to Fed Ex materials to this country so that they will actually GET there in less than three months ($200-300?). Paying for super special fingerprints for the USCIS ($720--yes, you read that right). We will make it happen. We've nearly paid for the home study and promise trust (that's over $4000). But could we use help? Oh yes, we can, trust me. We're pretty frugal folks--one older minivan for the family, lots of clearance back rack clothes shopping, well-versed in bean-based dishes, and vacations involve camping because it's cheap--but pinching pennies only goes so far.

We're running a giveaway to help raise these necessary funds. If you are led to help Alex (this is in the end for him! and even $5 is MUCH appreciated), put some money in the chip-in here, which goes into our paypal account:




Every person who donates money between now and October 21 will be added to our prayers. We will also use random.org on October 22 to choose a person to win a $30 credit at my sister-in-law Becky's Etsy shop, Roses for Mary. She hand-makes REALLY lovely rosaries out of clay and glaze--look at her shop feedback! People are truly delighted with these. A $30 credit is enough to buy one of the fanciest rosaries or 2-3 of the simpler rosaries or chaplets. Your selections must be limited to stock on hand. But here are some current samples:






They would make great Christmas presents, even if you aren't into rosey rosaries (and not all of them involve roses). So bookmark her store already! :-)

Also, if you aren't into rosaries (I know there are non-Catholic readers and friends out there), we'd be happy to give the winner a $30 Amazon gift card instead.

Please keep Alex in your prayers, and please spread the word about this giveaway via fb, Google+, twitter, your blog, email, or ye olde phone. It's humbling to ask for money...but for my son? I'd do much more than this.

--IC

UPDATE: Wow, folks. Thank you so much for your generosity, on just the first day of our begging.... We absolutely promise to make good use of this, and probably in the next 2-4 weeks. Thank you so much, and Alex would thank you if he knew (maybe? maybe? there's a stirring in his heart that something is happening?). The giveaway continues to run through Oct 21.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Someday...


...or the feature bird of a secular Christmas card.

Or both! I can see it now: "Seasons Greetings, my Aunt Fanny. Tell me Merry Christmas and kiss the ring as you do it, people!"

HT to The Deacon's Bench.

Friday, October 07, 2011

Friday's QOTD


"The Lord knew I lived in a hard town, so he gave me a hard head."

--The Rev. Fred Shuttlesworth,
in front of his home bombed by the KKK.
Civil rights activist in Birmingham, AL.
d. 10-5-2011

Wednesday, October 05, 2011

Introducing Chic* #5 (we hope)!

*chic=child of the Ironic Catholic!


Finally! We've been sitting on this for over a week, and have permission to share it now...it's a boy! Isn't he just beautiful?

We are trying to adopt a just-turned 5 yr old boy named Alex (well, that's his alias) from Eastern Europe. Go take a look--this picture is from when he was four.
http://reecesrainbow.org/sponsorwindleydaoust

The reason some family hasn't scooped up Alex and given him a huge hug and a home is that Alex can't walk and is diagnosed with CP. The biggest sadness about Alex is that after (likely) four years of "kinda OK" orphanage life, he was transferred to a mental institution a few weeks ago (this is typical in this country, and we just found this out two weeks ago, just before committing to him). This is a huge step down in care in every case there, and some of these institutions have horrific living conditions. The whole system is basically a holdover from the Soviet Union, when parents with disabled infants were, perhaps not forced, but expected to institutionalize their children--and then those same kids were left to circumstances of incredible neglect to the point of death. Since the country has no real system of oversight for these institutions, the situations vary quite a bit from barely OK to pretty near unspeakable. So when we heard Alex had been transferred--basically, our heart broke, we prayed, and we committed (on his 5th birthday).

The GOOD news is that the facilitator that works with Reece's Rainbow in that country went to visit said institution this weekend for a social call (that's a small joke) to see if he would be allowed in and take pictures of Alex. He got in, met Alex and got a slew of pictures. One is the picture above. The facilitator said that the institution was "not too bad" by the country's standards. That is actually a really hopeful statement, since the range of options are so poor. But the reality is this is a basic care institution--people assigned there are expected to die there, eventually. No school for sure, and almost certainly no therapy for his CP (although he may not have gotten much or any at the orphanage either). Care is very basic at best. So--our intention was to move this as fast as we can. Although we're glad Alex isn't in the worst of all situations, he still needs out. We're still trying to move fast.

"Fast" means, at absolute best, an adoption in late February. The country doesn't set any appointments for adoption referrals from November through January. We can't get everything in within three weeks--the INS and other agencies simply won't play ball that fast. So. We do lots of paperwork and pray a lot until he's home.

Just so you know, we're trying to adopt Alex, but we do not have a formal referral--that is, Alex isn't officially promised to us. The connection on the Reece's Rainbow site means that we can fundraise to adopt this particular child, and others working through RR should choose another child. He could get adopted prior to us arriving there. But that is fairly rare--especially with "older" kids. If Alex has been adopted, we will thank God he is out of his particular situation, probably cry a little bit, and we'll adopt a different child.

Finally, the biggest request by far and the reason for the post. Please, we ask for your prayers. A lot could go wrong in this process (it's faster than many international adoptions, but more complicated in other ways). And as for Alex, I'm a lot less worried about Alex's CP than I am about what the institutionalization could do to him, and what orphanage life does to a child. Basically, I'm more concerned for his spirit than his body. We're asking everyone we know for 1. prayers of protection for Alex, 2. prayers for the caregivers, that they may see the children and adults there with humanity, and 3. prayers for a smooth and fast adoption process. And maybe a couple of prayers for sic (that is, spouse of the Ironic Catholic) and I--it's been an emotional rollercoaster. But God has been so good throughout this. I've really never been in such an obviously God-led situation in my life.

If you want to follow along, we're blogging through this at http://www.wdadoption.blogspot.com . Once there, you could follow via email or an RSS reader.

In the midst of all this potential drama, we feel very blessed and happy that we may get to live with him. This is such a gift to us.

I am doing paperwork like mad, getting ready for a home study visit, and more. People have asked about money, and I will propose something tomorrow, if anyone wants to help. But for now, could you sing with us? Sing praise to the Lord, for He is good, His mercy endures forever!

Peace,
IC